Failure

I am lazy. I am the who destroys all my goals. I had a goal, a goal to go to community college, two years, that's it! I didn't know if I could do it. I know so many people who didn't do it in two. But I wanted to be different. Unfortunately the beginning math classes I had to take my first year set me back. 9 units, of un-transferable garbage. I finally had this teacher, who taught me everything from 3rd grade to college algebra in a matter of 2 semesters. I actually started to like math. I have never been good at math. I cop out. I feel dumb because I can't do normal, everyday math. I struggle with it, every damn day. Mad Minutes back in elementary school would ruin my day and that stupid line you had to draw after your last problem you finished, I did maybe ten problems (there's 50 on a sheet). In third grade, if I didn't pass my math mastery I was going to be held back. I cried all the time, I cried while I did my flashcards every night, I cried when I did my math homework. I was pissed at myself for never understanding it. I would work on my flashcards all the time. It was like extra homework on top of my normal homework. I LOATHED math. I finally took my test and I PASSED. I never really "passed" math, but I passed 3rd grade. I still never understood it, but I didn't care. That was the problem, because it haunted me all the way through junior high, high school, and now, in college. I finally reached Math 105, I know this sounds pathetic to those of you who are in statistics and calculus, but for me this was huge. I started off great, till I took my first test. I understood all the math but my teacher doesn't give partial credit. I didn't have a= on one of my problems, got the 5 minute problem right, but forgot that a=, and no credit. I about died. Second test wasn't any better. I decided to drop (today actually), Cal State Fullerton, won't accept me anyway because I needed 60 units, now that wasn't going to happen. What's wrong with 3 years at a community college? Well today god slapped me in the face. I dropped that math class and got my ACCEPTANCE letter in the mail, guess how many units I needed..... 9. The amount of units that my baby, doesn't count for shit, pluses and take-away, math classes took up of my time and money. Math, you won. I am staying another year at Santiago and I owe it all to you.